# My dog's afraid of me



## RedZeppelin (Nov 24, 2008)

I tried using a throw can today with my dog, and on the third or fourth use of the can, he became terrified, hid under the couch, began avoiding me and refusing my commands. Instead of following me, wanting to stay with me, lying near me and following my commands, he follows other people and prefers to stay alone on his bed. Even when I present him with treats, he's reluctant to obey. Even when I try to play with him, I feel that he's tense and fearful. What do I do?

The throw can I'm using is actually one of those plastic vitamin containers. It's filled with a few coins. It's impossible that I somehow hurt my dog physically with it.


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## RawFedDogs (Jun 22, 2008)

RedZeppelin said:


> Even when I try to play with him, I feel that he's tense and fearful. What do I do?


Hmmmm ... kinda makes you think throwing noisy cans at a dog doesn't get the results you want. Maybe jerking on the leash will have the same effect. Take the time to learn how to interact positively with your dog to TEACH him what you want him to do when you ASK him to. Get the word "command" out of your vocabulary and use the word "ask" or "que".

Get the book, The Power of Positive Dog Training", by Pat Miller and you will learn a lot. I have never thrown things at, jerked the leash, yelled, hit, kicked, pinched the ear or otherwise done things my dogs wouldn't like to get them to do what I wanted. Yet they do everything I ask, even sometimes things they haven't been taught.

My youngest dog, Thor, will do anything I ask of him and he has never had a formal training session in his life.



> The throw can I'm using is actually one of those plastic vitamin containers. It's filled with a few coins. It's impossible that I somehow hurt my dog physically with it.


You hurt him mentally and that's much worse and longer lasting. It drove a wedge in your relationship that will take time to overcome. Learn to train using ONLY positive methods. Using aversives can only hurt a loving relationship.


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## Patt (Feb 12, 2008)

RedZeppelin said:


> I tried using a throw can today with my dog, and on the third or fourth use of the can, he became terrified, hid under the couch, began avoiding me and refusing my commands. Instead of following me, wanting to stay with me, lying near me and following my commands, he follows other people and prefers to stay alone on his bed.


WHY on earth are you throwing a noisy can at him? The noise is enough to scare him to death. I don't blame him for being terrified, I would be too.


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## RedZeppelin (Nov 24, 2008)

I started following the advice in a book titled _Back to Basics Dog Training_ by Fabian, which uses the word "command" repeatedly and tells owners to use these throw cans, bean bags or chains as the only means of reprimanding bad behavior. The goal is to make the dog think he's being punished by the object rather than you, but obviously that didn't work in my case. It's supposed to simply startle the dog. It actually seemed pretty effective the first few times I used it. Clearly I committed a grave error in this training technique. I'm not specifically looking for alternative ones, but of ways to revert the damage I've caused. Now I'm just hoping that he'll heal with time and affection.


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## K9companions (Nov 13, 2008)

There are many training methods out there and each one may, or may not, have an affect on a dog. Don't feel bad, and don't give up on yourself! You see that the can method is not working, so I would definately stop using that, but that doesn't mean that your relationship with the dog is gone forever. I would switch training methods and start again. Over the next days, your pup will see she/he can trust you again and go from there. I would try working again on the commands you know, perhaps using treats and such. If he does do something wrong, you can ignore the behavior and give treats for only the good behaviour, or you can use a simple reprimend like 'no'. As I said, there a MILLIONS of training methods and everyone has their own ideas. What's important is that you use a method that is good for both you AND the dog. Find your rythm and move from there!


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## pattymac (Oct 11, 2008)

There are dogs out there that even raising your voice to them causes them to shut down, tail between the legs etc. They need a more positive touch to their training. If you don't necessarily want to ignore the 'bad behaviour' you can try redirecting them with something you want them to do. I do that with Bayley, right now and for as long as I've had her she has a thing for my socks, she doesn't eat them but she loves to 'kill' them. I've taken to grabbing her fave toy and taking off with it, well she forgets the sock and comes after me to play with her toy. I throw the toy for her and go get the sock. Of course if I put my socks in the laundry bin then she wouldn't have the opportunity to grab them


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## Patt (Feb 12, 2008)

What is the age of your dog, and what is the breed?


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## wvasko (Dec 15, 2007)

K9
Well stated, Dogs are resilient. I don't believe 4 or 5 thrown cans is the end of life in the dog world as we know it. Obviously future can throwing is a no-no. At the very least I think I would read a different book that did not involve in so much throwing of things. I guess I understand the theory I just have never used it myself, if I have to reprimand a dog I do want the dog to know exactly where and who it's coming from. *I am not suggesting you reprimand your dog for anything,* as a positive approach is needed here to get the scales balanced properly.


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## blackrose (Oct 7, 2006)

Don't feel bad. Well, feel bad, but know you aren't alone. I remember one training session I did with Rose...I was trying to teach her to heel (had been for the past two weeks) and she was just NOT getting it. I'd tried everything under the sun and she still wasn't getting it. I normally wouldn't freak out, but we had a competition coming up and she NEEDED to know heel. I was getting extremely frustrated and very, very negative. Needless to say, that didn't help at all. It was when she finally tucked her tail between her legs, put her ears back, and refused to move that I finally woke up. 
I sat down with her, shed a few tears, said I was sorry, and then had her sit for a handful of treats. Being the amazing dog she is, she forgave me the second I sat down. I was less forgiving towards myself and beat myself up about it for a few days. 

I learned a wonderful lesson that day. Whenever I start feeling frustrated during training I stop. If the dog isn't have a blast during training, I stop. If a dog just isn't getting something I stop and rethink how I could teach it. 
Rose never did learn to sit when I stopped walking, but she did learn heel. We did horrible at the competition (145/200), but we both had fun (and she let a strange man touch her AND she down/stayed even when a dog fight broke out right by her!  ) and that is what mattered. 

Your dog is scared because he doesn't understand what you want of him. He views you as some unpredictable person that causes discomfort for no apparent reason. He is hesitant because he doesn't know what will set you off and cause you to punish him again. He could also have a soft personality so even things you don't think of as severe are the end of the world to him (could be a raised voice, could be a loud noise, could be a slight tug on the leash, etc.). 

Take a deep breath and start over. Train him using positive meathods. Dogs are forgiving creatures. While it may take a while to regain his trust, depending on your past relationship sith him and how severely your dog was scared, you can gain it back. Show him that pleasent things happen when he is around you and that you aren't going to cause him harm.


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## RedZeppelin (Nov 24, 2008)

Thanks a lot for all the advice and support.
He's a Brazilian terrier
six months old


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## Patt (Feb 12, 2008)

RedZeppelin said:


> Thanks a lot for all the advice and support.
> He's a Brazilian terrier
> six months old


Wow, you've got yourself quite a little dog there. You have gotten great advice. Time and patience will also help you. I look forward to seeing pictures of him. What is his name?

For those that do not know the breed, here is some info.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brazilian_Terrier
http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/brazilianterier.htm


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## RedZeppelin (Nov 24, 2008)

He's a lot better since yesterday's incident. Back to normal.
His name's Afonso

Are you familiar with this breed, Patt? I didn't figure there were many of these dogs in the US.


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## Elana55 (Jan 7, 2008)

I know nothing of Brazilian Terriers but it sure sounds exotic and fun!

I would suggest a really inexpensive book with step by step proceedure for training your dog: The Complete Idiots Guide to Positive Dog Training by Pamela Dennison (Penguin Books). 

This is not to suggest you are an idiot (the name of the book puts some people off). You have tried something with your dog and it doesn't work. OK, lesson learned. This dog sounds like he would respond to Positive training extremely well and will, in no time at all, come around to what you want. 

Another place I suggest you go for advice is www.clickertraining.com and the stickies at the top of the forum regarding Free Clicker training and Ian Dunbar. 

We all make mistakes and are so lucky that most of our dogs are so forgiving of mistakes. I have trained horses that were not like this.. you get it wrong and they got it as hard and fast as when you get it right.. and the 'undo' button is really hard to get to work!


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## BarclaysMom (Aug 24, 2008)

I'm glad to hear he's feeling better. My dogs are sensitive too, positive training has worked well for them. I'll bet your dog is really smart, he'll love it because it encourages them to think things out for themselves.


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## Patt (Feb 12, 2008)

RedZeppelin said:


> His name's Afonso
> 
> Are you familiar with this breed, Patt? I didn't figure there were many of these dogs in the US.


I'm glad to hear Alfonso is doing better today. No, I'm not familiar with the breed although I did a search to see what they were all about. They're very similar to our Jack Russell Terriers. and they are a hand full plus being very smart. LOL 

Do you have dog trainers (obedience classes) that can help you with him? I know that would be helpful to the both of you. 

Good luck.


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