# reading dog body language - stares lovingly into eyes



## dogclass (Feb 16, 2011)

Hi there. Just continuing with getting to know my dog.

We've had Cody for 3 weeks now. He's very snugly. We try to make it a point to pet him on our terms, by calling him over. But admittedly, he still gets petted and loved when he comes over to us on the couch, and puts his chin in our laps. He's pretty naturally submissive dog, and even with all that I've read, I think he sees us as top dogs...

Anyways, when he comes over to us (either on his own or because we call), he has this habit looking up at us lovingly with his chin in our laps. It's kind of surreal to see him look at us like that...and I wonder if he's actually challenging us? I don't have any other behavioral signs that would suggest that he is trying to be dominant. He's doing well with obedience training (sit, down, come, stays before eating). But I want to make sure we're not encouraging anything.

Some dog advice websites seem to stress the dominance/submissive human-dog relationship quite a bit. We don't follow all those advice to the letter. I still sit on the floor to play with him often because he's not allowed on the couch (which he obeys perfectly).

What do you think?


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## lil_fuzzy (Aug 16, 2010)

Eye contact isn't a challenge. He's being affectionate.

I would recommend letting go of all the pack leader theory stuff. It's pointless. I don't act like the pack leader, I have just trained my dogs to behave the way I want them to behave. They still initiate cuddles and play time and walk ahead of me on walks and ask me to do stuff for them which I will (like letting them out, fill the water bowl etc) and that doesn't make them think they are dominant.

Just have fun with it, and don't worry about being pack leader.


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## hanksimon (Mar 18, 2009)

I agree with Fuzzy. You are doing fine, and only encouraging good things. Dominance and pack leader was something that we stopped using decades ago. Your dog loves you and is trying to learn the rules of the house. Be consistent and loving, and keep doing what you are doing. When Cody does something that you don't want, it is not dominance, but it is because he doesn't know the rules.... let us know and we will try to help. 

Advanced: Many of us let our dogs on the furniture... but we teach them the rules. The dog can jump on the furniture, only when invited, and must get off immediately when asked. Be aware that once you teach a dog to do something that he really likes - like barking, eating table scraps, begging, jumping on people, jumping on the furniture... then he will always try to do this (wouldn't you?) unless you are careful to teach him to do these behaviors, only on cue.... which is why people recommend not letting dogs do these things.


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## JiveDadson (Feb 22, 2010)

Yeah, lose the dominance/pack-leader theory. It is bunk.

It sounds like you have a very nice doggy. There are a couple of tricks you can teach him to deal with his affection when it is not a good time, namely "Touch," and "Off."

Touch: Train the dog to touch your hand with his nose on the cue, "Touch." That is handy for moving him short distances, for example when he is sitting where you want to be. "Excuse me" is a related trick. It just means, I am going where you are now, so move.

Off: Train the dog to hop to the floor when you point and say, "Off." My gray dog Zoot, _loves_ to respond to "Off." He jumps down in an instant, looks at me, and wags his tail.

Caveat. It is true what they say about sleeping dogs. If you need to wake him up, use gentle sounds and give him while to realize what is going on.


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## Crantastic (Feb 3, 2010)

Many of us have taught our dogs to stare into our eyes on purpose. It's the first step in teaching a lot of different behaviors. You want your dog to trust you and focus on you. When I have a treat in my hand, my Casper sits in front of me and practically bores holes through my head with his stare. He does not think he's above me in some kind of hierarchy.

I'd recommend a book... _The Other End of the Leash_ by Patricia McConnell, an applied animal behaviorist and dog trainer. She talks about dog body language, how dogs and humans relate to each other, and why you shouldn't worry about that "dominance" stuff. 

I like this quote from another respected behaviorist and trainer, Ian Dunbar (from this article):



> From an assortment of books, I have discovered the following cautionary “advice” for owners. Never let a dog stare or jump-up, never stand, crouch or kneel down in front of a dog, never look a dog in the eyes, or reach over his head, never loom over a dog and reach down around his neck, never get down on the floor or allow a dog to stand over you, never give a dog food treats or human food, never allow a dog to eat before the family or go out of a door first, never allow a dog on furniture, upstairs, in the bedroom, or on the bed, never let a dog mount your leg, never let a puppy mouth or bite, and never play chase, tug o' war, or play-fight with a dog. Instead, novice owners are routinely advised to enforce “elevation dominance”, “dominance down-stays”, physical restraint and discipline and especially, the “alpha-rollover” — grabbing a dog by the jowls and forcing him onto his back.
> 
> All of these recommendations destroy the fun and enjoyment of living with a dog, most recommendations are just too silly for words, some are counterproductive and others are downright dangerous.
> 
> The above behaviors and actions were misconstrued as the dog's intention of dominating people even though these behaviors and situations have absolutely nothing at all to do with social rank or aggression during dog-human interactions. Basically, if an owner is OK with the dog’s behavior, then there is no problem, whereas if the owner is worried about the dog’s behavior and can neither prevent nor control it, then there is a problem.


More reading on dominance theory.


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## Cracker (May 25, 2009)

This is Cracker doing her thing, her I'm happy and I love you face...

Soft eyes, loose mouth etc indicates a happy, content and trusting dog. Challenge schmallenge. A challenging stare is something completely different, it's HARD..the eyes are hard, the mouth is tight and the body is stiff and ready to back it up. Do some proper reading on dog body language and avoid any "alpha" "packleader" "dominance" type worded sites. You sound like you have a very nice and affectionate dog and trying to read his behaviour with hierarchy in mind tints the behaviour into things that are not there, not fair to him and not fair to you or your relationship with him. 






 
This is video one of a series of 6 of canine body language by Jean Donaldson. It's worth watching the whole series, though it can be a bit dry at times...it's not long, I think each segment is ten minutes or so.


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## JiveDadson (Feb 22, 2010)

Crantastic said:


> Many of us have taught our dogs to stare into our eyes on purpose.


Good point! I am one of those many-of-us's. 

Dogclass (if that is your real name), teaching your dog the "Look" trick will be easy, because he is already vounteering the behavior. All you need to do is to "capture" the behavior and add the cue.


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## hanksimon (Mar 18, 2009)

Yeah, I don't have any good pictures, but I have tug and chase under well-defined rules... however, barking and snarling are allowed ! But, it is absurd and surreal to be sitting down with a calm dog smiling and barking 'visciously' or better ... snarling like a Tasmanian devil, staring straight at me with soft eyes and with full wolf teeth ready to rip out my throat... then he drops the tugtoy and so gingerly takes hold, avoiding teeth touching skin, then starting growling and snarling once again... Could never tell it from the avatar picture....


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## JiveDadson (Feb 22, 2010)

One more thing. Staring into a human's eyes is a trait that domestic dogs have but wolves do not. Survival of the cutest. DNA can be very clever about how it gets its phenotype to propagate it.


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## JuneBud (Feb 17, 2010)

When my pup stares into my eyes with what looks like adoration, it melts my heart and makes all his "issues" worth while.


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