# How to housetrain and desensitize your dog to being alone at the same time?



## mydoghailey (Feb 23, 2011)

I've had Hailey for one month now. She's 9 months old. She's doing pretty well with housetraining... 5 accidents total, 1 accident in the last 17 days. That’s progress, right??

We're pretty vigilant and take her out pretty often (at least every 2 hrs when she’s not in her crate). She always wants to be with us, so that makes her easier to supervise. I'm a little concerned though that she isn't learning to be very independent. She cries if she's locked out of a room for a few seconds and she knows she can't get to you. She cries whenever she's put in her crate. She will leave the room on her own briefly to go look for a toy or something, so it's not like she has to be glued to us, but rather than encouraging that, I always have to call her back to supervise her. 

She won't sit still if you're not still. If she's sleeping on the couch with me and I get up to grab a book or something, she hops up and follows me those few feet. I wish she'd just relax! 

I am working on getting her used to her crate (treating her for going inside on her own, etc). I will Google “crate games” as I’ve seen suggested on other threads. She doesn't love her crate, but I don't think that's the issue... I think it's mostly that she doesn't like being alone. She's less obnoxious in the crate if you're in the room. I do put here in there when we're home during the day and she cries at first, but then she's ok. She has been crying for shorter and shorter amounts of time at night (the crate is in our room)... some nights she doesn't cry at all.

She goes nuts when we leave the house, but I'm pretty sure she doesn't carry on for more than a couple minutes (I’ve stood outside). She’s usually fairly calm when we get home, so it doesn't seem like true SA. She also doesn’t go potty in her crate or destroy anything. 

I do leave the tv on for her and she gets her Nylabones and a kong in her crate. She has a dog walker mid-day on Mondays (who just texted me, “Boy, she really howls when you leave!”). On Wednesdays, she goes to Doggie Daycare. On Tues. and Thurs. she’s home in the crate for 6-7 hrs. The rest of the time we’re home.

I may try that DAP thing I've heard mentioned on here and leave something of mine (shirt?) in there with her. 

Do you think she’ll just grow out of it or should I be trying something else?

Thanks!


----------



## Bloodhound Bella (Aug 20, 2009)

Cute dog!
I had this problem when my dog was a puppy and I fear she may actually have Seperation Anxiety now because she's 3 and is still doing the same stuff. Has the problem improved for you? What did you do?
Thanks!


----------



## doxiemommy (Dec 18, 2009)

One thing I noticed in your post that is encouraging is, you said she will leave the room to go look for a toy. That tells me that she's not completely attached to you, and might respond well to learning to be independent. 
Working on getting her comfortable in the crate is a great idea. Even though you don't think the crate is the issue, it does give her a chance to be "by herself" for a bit, even if you are still in the room. And, when you are working on getting her to be ok in the crate, it would be great for you to occassionally leave the room that she and the crate are in, just for a few seconds, and come back. Then, gradually increase the time you are out of the room.

Another you could do is, when you need to get up from the couch and she follows you: let her. BUT, don't talk to her, and make it boring. For instance, if you need to get up to get a book, maybe you could throw a few extra steps in: get up, go get a book. Get up, put that one back, and get a new one. Get up, and grab a tissue, or go to the bathroom. In other words, every time you get up, go back and forth a few times times, make it boring and repetitive so she sees "gosh, what is with this up and down, she's always getting up for some silly reason, this is pointless, I'm just gonna stay here and stop following her."

Also, when you leave the tv on, make sure it's not animal planet...it might seem like a good idea, but my little pup gets excited when she sees/hears other dogs on tv and starts barking.....

Does she get enough exercise during the day? Exercise can help dogs who get anxious when they're left alone...


----------



## mydoghailey (Feb 23, 2011)

Doxiemommy - that's a great suggestion about making the ups and downs boring/repetitive and not providing attention. I will definitely give that a try.

I've also been letting her into the fenced backyard by herself and watching from a window. At first she wouldn't leave the sliding door between us, but eventually she went out exploring on her own. I had to watch and run out though whenever she started digging or otherwise getting into trouble.

I'm also working hard on teaching "stay"... I could eventually try that when I get up, but right now she'd just "fail" and follow, I am sure.

I'll continue with the crate training. I have been putting her in there for short bits of time while I go in another room and I do think that's helping. 

She cries much less if the whole crate is covered (instead of just the sides and back), but I don't want to keep her in the dark during the day unless you recommend this? Covering the whole crate seems to be helping her at night though, maybe because she can't see me in bed? I did put one of my shirts in her crate and that seems to have helped... she hasn't been crying at night.

Does it matter that she has two crates? One upstairs in our bedroom and one in the LR? I hardly ever practice with the crate upstairs since she's been doing well at night. I only put her in the downstairs crate when I'm gone. They are basically the same. Would it be easier for her if the crate where she spent time during the day was the same one as where she slept at night?

I agree re: Animal Planet and the barking dogs! I did leave it on AP a few times but have been doing random tv or music lately.

I'm working REALLY hard to keep her well exercised.

Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it.


----------



## lisaj1354 (Feb 23, 2008)

Pepper used to follow every step I took.

I've had him a year now (he's 2) and he just started staying on the couch when I get up to get a bottle of water, empty the dishwasher, put dishes away. However, if he hears his treat jar open, he's in the kitchen like a shot.

Since Pepper is a rescue, I chalked it all up to insecurity on his part. He is now much more secure in his environment, and with me.


----------



## lil_fuzzy (Aug 16, 2010)

doxiemommy said:


> One thing I noticed in your post that is encouraging is, you said she will leave the room to go look for a toy. That tells me that she's not completely attached to you, and might respond well to learning to be independent.
> Working on getting her comfortable in the crate is a great idea. Even though you don't think the crate is the issue, it does give her a chance to be "by herself" for a bit, even if you are still in the room. And, when you are working on getting her to be ok in the crate, it would be great for you to occassionally leave the room that she and the crate are in, just for a few seconds, and come back. Then, gradually increase the time you are out of the room.
> 
> Another you could do is, when you need to get up from the couch and she follows you: let her. BUT, don't talk to her, and make it boring. For instance, if you need to get up to get a book, maybe you could throw a few extra steps in: get up, go get a book. Get up, put that one back, and get a new one. Get up, and grab a tissue, or go to the bathroom. In other words, every time you get up, go back and forth a few times times, make it boring and repetitive so she sees "gosh, what is with this up and down, she's always getting up for some silly reason, this is pointless, I'm just gonna stay here and stop following her."
> ...


I have noticed this with my dog, she usually follows me around everywhere, but when we are on the couch watching tv she gives up following me after I have been up a couple of times, because I usually just go and get a drink or something equally uninteresting and then return, so she then chooses to just wait for me on the couch. So I can see that working quite well.


----------



## mydoghailey (Feb 23, 2011)

Getting up and down frequently from the couch seems to have really helped! She is starting to stay on the couch by herself sometimes. 

She's also come a long way with "stay" and will hold a "down-stay" while I go into another room. We've also been able to get her to stay in her bed in the living room while we're eating (though I am still treating her every 3 min or so for staying).

I've been working on crate training... lots of treats for going in there, special toys only for the crate, putting her in there for short periods of time while I'm home, etc.

However, this week, Mon - Thurs, I put her in a small bathroom while I was at work because I was afraid to keep her in her crate with she was getting over gastroenteritis. I didn't want her to be stuck in her crate if she had diarrhea or something. She did really well there... not nearly as much crying as in the crate.

I put a baby gate across the door of the small master bathroom and put her night time crate, water bowl, and a nylabone in there. When she first got home from the hospital I put her in there at night because she was peeing like crazy (maybe all the IV fluids?)... she didn't go potty in there though... never went potty in there all week. Anyway, she seems to like it in there... Should I put her in there instead of the crate downstairs? She seems to still be sleeping in the crate, but in the bathroom the crate door is open. There are 2 days per week when she is home alone for 6 - 8 hrs... I'd prefer to have her in the bathroom as long as she is not having accidents there because I feel bad keeping her confined to a crate for that long... however, will that really screw her up for when I need her to be in a crate (i.e., when traveling). What do you think?


----------



## doxiemommy (Dec 18, 2009)

Some dogs do better when they're confined in a little bigger space, like a bathroom or laundry room with a baby gate. It's weird, it kind of depends on the puppy. Some do better in the small area of a crate because they feel safe, like a den. But, some do better in a bigger space. 
We used a ex-pen in a corner of the kitchen, and put the crate, toys, a frozen, stuffed kong, and water.

If the bathroom is working better than the crate when you're gone, use it! 

If you're worried that she will forget how to be comfortable in the crate when you travel, just make sure that you continue doing the crate conditioning exercises, getting her to go into the crate with a frozen, stuffed kong from time to time. I'm a teacher, and am home a lot more in the summer, but I still get the dogs to go into their crates and spend time alone, so they don't freak out when school starts again.


----------

