# Possessive,jealous dog?



## Leanne (Apr 4, 2011)

Hey everyone,I'm new to this site. 
Need some advice and maybe reassurance,,,we have just got our Springer Spaniel Milly,she's gonna be 2 on 4th July,she's so soft and really obedient and really quite calm for a springer (i always heard they were really boistrous). She's perfect ,,,apart from she doesn't like my 2 yr old daughter.....

Don't get me wrong,,,they play together well with the ball,Milly allows her to take the ball from her mouth and is gentle,when my daughter tells her to sit,she sits etc.
The problem I have...by the way my husband works away and is bk at wkends....its just me and my 3 kids thru the week with Milly...the problem I have is that whenever I'm givin Milly attention e.g she puts her front paws on my lap and i stroke her chest,,,if my daughter comes up for cuddles too Milly doesn't like it and has snapped about 6 times now,,,not made contact with my daughter's face but just snapped in it,,,its as if she's sayin "go away,she's mine". Milly follows me everywhere,whatever I'm doin around the house,she's there watchin.

Other times when Milly is lyin on the rug,my daughter sometimes goes up to her to give her a hug,and Milly looks very uncomfortable and I have to watch because it looks like at any moment she could snap again,,,,,yet shes so soft?
The other day,,me and my daughter were playin ruff and tumble,and Milly tried to mount my leg and my daughter. I didn't even kno female dogs did that?????

I suppose I would just like to kno wot everyone else thinks and wot I could do about it. We've had Milly for almost 5 weeks now,,,i don't kno much about her background other than she used to be one of 8 dogs in her previous home.

All feedback appreciated . Thx .


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## Cracker (May 25, 2009)

Soft does not mean safe. Sometimes soft means ANXIOUS. It is a very good sign that she only snaps and does not make contact, but ANYTHING that causes her to snap at your child must be stopped. This means NO HUGGING, no touching the dog when she's resting and making sure your daughter knows the rules and that you enforce them. This is about the CHILD being dog safe and only partly about the dog. Kids get bitten by family dogs of long standing for doing things that are not doggy socially acceptable and this dog is not a family dog of long standing, she's only been with you five weeks. Kids should NEVER be allowed to hug dogs. Period. Hugging is a threatening thing to dogs. Dogs that are scared or uncomfortable react in the only way they know how. Kids should never be allowed to interact with dogs (especially new ones) with toys or when they are near their beds or food dishes. This is basic bite prevention and applies to ALL dogs and ALL kids. You should be fully supervising all interactions between the two. If you cannot be ACTIVELY supervising then child and dog must be separate. Dog in crate or baby gated room. Child with you. Etc. Again, this is not just your dog, this is safety with all dogs. Neither one of them have the ability to make good decisions, they are both about intellectually at the same level, so you have to be the manager of this.

Resource guarding of YOU is a sign of anxiety and she very likely had to resource guard many things from the other dogs in her previous home. Humping is also a sign of anxiety. Has nothing to do with sex or dominance or anything else...

You need to do several things here as a training/behaviour mod program: You need to get up and walk away when she guards you. Immediately get up and IGNORE HER. Teach her a go to mat or go to crate behaviour using positive reinforcement and make it a rule that no one approach her when she's in her "safe place". Start giving her awesome things to do when you are giving attention to the child, ie give her a stuffed kong to work on so that she starts to associate YOU giving attn. to the child with GOOD things. 

Make sure dog gets training on GIVE (using the trade approach) so that she learns to drop things for you on CUE so that you never have to take anything from her mouth, you should not be taking the ball from her, she should be giving it to you WILLINGLY, no, HAPPILY!! for you to throw again. And yes, again...do not allow your child to take anything from the dog, PERIOD. Resource guarding of you indicates that she may be finding the child stressful to be around and your child taking her ball (even though it's in play) is very likely starting to have her think the child TAKES THINGS. See what I'm saying here? The more you take, the more likely the dog is to start guarding objects. She must (you must teach her ) to WANT to give you and the child stuff because the most awesome things happen when she does. 

There are many threads here on Resource guarding. This is a behaviour that MUST be modified to ensure it doesn't get worse. It is very important it's done positively and without great stress for the dog. Stressed dogs have behaviour issues, relaxed dogs do not. 

Make sure the dog gets adequate mental and physical exercise and training. If you cannot do appropriate exercise, hire a dogwalker. Make the training rewarding and fun and keep it short. Training teaches self control. 

If you need to, get in a trainer to help you set up the resoure guarding protocol and show you how to teach go to mat/crate etc. If dog follows you around all the time, use the go to mat or separate yourself with doors etc so she can learn to be alone at times etc. She's frightened, anxious and needy and you need to find a balance between giving her attention, giving her what else she needs and teaching her she's safe when she's not with you. All of this requires the child and you learning to let her alone.


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## Leanne (Apr 4, 2011)

Thankyou SO much for ur reply! This all makes sense and I will definately take on board everythin u've told me.
Thinkin about it,Milly is bound to be anxious just comin to a new home away from the other dogs,,,I didn't realise that huggin is threatenin to dogs,I will be stoppin my daughter from doin that right away.
Thanks again.


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## palmtree77 (Apr 5, 2011)

I just wanted to say that Cracker, you give the most knowledeable, insightful behavior posts that I've seen.


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## xxxxdogdragoness (Jul 22, 2010)

palmtree77 said:


> I just wanted to say that Cracker, you give the most knowledeable, insightful behavior posts that I've seen.


Ditto!  I've always thought that as well!


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