# We adopted together, but he is only attached to my partner!! Help!



## shibainu (May 26, 2011)

Hello--I'm totally depressed about this...I'm trying to not take it personally, but by golly it's a challenge.
My boyfriend and I recently adopted a 1.5-2 year old shiba inu from a rescue, and much to my sadness...the shiba has become completely attached to my boyfriend, and couldn't care less about me. The shiba exhibits separation anxiety symptoms when my boyfriend so much as leaves the room for 10 seconds. It is not because the shiba is lonely, because I'm sitting next to him. He doesn't get shaky or bark, but he does run around, chew things, try to destroy things, and generally push all of the buttons I possess. He also won't look at me, or play with me, or let me pet him when my boyfriend isn't in the house. What should I do?! I am giving him walks, giving him his food, practicing basic commands with treats...doing bonding activities. Just not sure what else I can do? I'm afraid this dog will tear apart my relationship.

Would love some advice! Thank you


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## doxiemommy (Dec 18, 2009)

How long have you had this dog?


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## shibainu (May 26, 2011)

Just a week...so I hope there is time to work on the separation anxiety and bonding?


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## Labmom4 (Feb 1, 2011)

A week isnt very long. Try hard not to take it too persoanlly. In my experience, dog's do tend to pick a 'favorite' person in the family. That doesnt mean he wont love you too. I have 3 dogs. I've trained them all and I feed and take care of them, but 2 of the 3 think my husband is the best thing in the world. Once he comes home, they have no interest in me at all. Thats ok. I know they love me too. They show it (when he's not there) and I'd bet your dog will show it too. Give the relationship time to form.


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## lisak_87 (Mar 23, 2011)

A week definitely isn't that long. Brady, our pup, was extremely attached to me for about a month before he began really developing a relationship with my boyfriend (We also adopted together).

A few things that help:
YOU be the one to feed him for a couple of weeks
YOU be the one to walk him for a couple of weeks
Take him to obedience (just you and him)
Work on training (just you and him)

The more of these fun/good things that happen with you, the better the bond will become.

But patience.... because the dog is still adapting to the new environment. 1 week is a very short time.


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## doxiemommy (Dec 18, 2009)

Oh, yes, I think a week is a bit too soon to start worrying!  But, definitely continue being the one to feed and train, and all that. That should help.


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## xxxxdogdragoness (Jul 22, 2010)

Not too experienced in shiba inus, but some breeds are a one person dog, ACDs are this way, as are GSDs & most of the other working breeds. I also agree with the feeding, training, husbandry idea. Be the one he looks to for everything, with time he will learn that you BOTH are responsible for his care.


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## GottaLuvMutts (Jun 1, 2009)

How much background do you have on this dog? With a rescue, there's always a chance of previous experiences factoring into their behavior. Is it possible that the dog was owned by or very attached to a man in his previous home? 

My dog likes (no, loves) everyone, but she gets more excited about meeting men than women. I know that one owner before me was a man, and it's possible she bonded with him. Also, since I'm the one instituting all the rules, doing the training, etc., she thinks that women will make her work for what she wants, while men are pushovers.


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## aBlueDog (Feb 14, 2011)

I think history could play a part. With Zoey, who I got when she was 10weeks, is noticeably more attached to females than she is to males. Im the one who works with her feeds trains ect. and it seems that she responds better to other women than she does men. Its possible that is whats going on with your situation. Used to men, bonds easier with men.


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