# Puppy Doesnt like Me



## Shelbys Mama (Feb 2, 2010)

Hello everyone!

I have some very basic concerns with my new puppys behavior, I am a first time puppy mommy and would really appreciate any input that you may have - even constructive criticism. 

She is a 14 week old rottweiler husky mix, and I love her very much - but I feel like the feeling isnt mutual ( She really does seem to prefer the company of my husband to me. At first we thought that perhaps it was a dominance issue and that he was just the alpha, but lately she just seems to be a little snippy with me. I have been told to be assertive in saying "NO" or "OUCH" She gets barky and nippy with me almost aggressively/defensively. I have tried positive reinforcement with treats since shes very food motivated, I feed her in the mornings and take turns playing with her but I worry that we arent bonding. She has however learned very quickly to sit, and follows me sitting but it almost feels like a negative association she has with it possibly even though she knows she will get a treat.


The second concern I have is with what seems like a negative behavioral issue with pooping and peeing in the house. We take her out very frequently, and give her plenty of time to use the restroom but it seems like she is having more and more accidents at home. She never used to, and after spending a week with my mom while I was on a business trip mom reports no accidents at all but once she stepped back into our home she had 2 accidents in the first 2 hours, neither of which seemed much like accidents but more like acting out.

I suppose most of all I just need to know what the best way to start off a better relationship with my puppy would be. I want to be able to take the time to start obedience and learning and having fun with her - but I really honestly feel like she hates me or maybe is scared of me? I know its not an instant process but I feel very discouraged. HELP!!! 

<3 Shelby's Mom


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## spotted nikes (Feb 7, 2008)

I doubt she hates you. Possibly you might be unsure of how to treat her so you are inconsistent...ie, a little harsher one time, and let things slip another. Dogs do best with consistency.

If she nips, try "yelping" then turn away and ignore her. She'll learn that nipping means that the play ends. Also substituting a chew toy can help.

Are you cleaning up her accidents with an enzyme cleaner like "Natures Miracle" or "Kids n Pets"? Otherwise it is like a big sign saying "PEE HERE" left on the carpet. 

If she has an accident try to pick her up and take her out right away. Really praise her for going outside. Ignore inside accidents, other than a "ahhh, ahh" or something, to break her concentration. Keep her tethered to you when inside so she can't slip away and pee.


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## briteday (Feb 10, 2007)

It sounds like you need to keep a more positive attitude with your dog. Dogs are very good at reading feelings of the humans around them. And it's not unusual for a dog to bond with one person more strongly than another. Some breeds are especially prone to that.

We have 3 dogs. One never leaves MY side, sleeps on my feet whenever I am sitting down. One dog sticks to my daughter like glue. And the third dog loves everyone in the house equally, no favorites. So don't take it personally.

Dogs can't pee out of spite or anything like that. If she had to go and you didn't let her out she just did business where ever she happened to be. I'm guessing that mom didn't want you to feel bad about leaving the dog and chose toleave out the part about any messes inside. I like crate training because the dog is contained when they cannot be supervised, prevents having an opportunity to make the mistake in the first place.

Sign the dog up for some puppy classes when you can. And try to be the active human participant if it's important to you. Remember to stay positive!


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## Robrowe (Jan 25, 2010)

Good advice^^^^^
One thing to add with the bonding. Consistancy is a plus. When feeding time comes hand feed her when you can, give her a couple of pieces of kibble at a time out of your hand. He (or she) who controls resources is higher in the pack. I had a simliar issue with my kids and my Lab. The problem stemmed from them wanting to get in the floor and play with him and he would nip at them. Not that he was being aggressive but he viewed them as litter mates and played with them as such. I had each of them take turns for awhile hand feeding him and got them to stay up off the floor so they were above him at all times and to practice the "Ouch" and turn away when he would get them. Within a week he was seeing them as being higher up in the pack and no longer nipped them. You have to project yourself as a higher member of the pack.


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## Cracker (May 25, 2009)

Lots of good advice so far.

It is important to let her DEVELOP her relationship with you. She may choose one member of the family to be more bonded to, I like my older brother better than my younger sister, though I love them equally, so it happens with us too!

What I would do in your position is take a look at ME. Is there anything I'm doing that is inconsistent or confusing to the dog? Dogs are very good body language readers, but unfortunately *we* are not great body language _controllers _and often our mental unsureness of things is reflected in our subconscious movements..the dog sees this. This can effect our communication with our dogs.

Housetraining accidents happen. She does NOT have full control of her bodily functions and puppies often have little setbacks here and there. Management is key, freedom in the house unsupervised is asking for accidents. Going out with the pup on leash and rewarding immediately when voiding is also important. They may pee out of fear, stress, submission, excitement etc, but not out of spite, so try not to project too much here when she has an accident.

As for the nipping, follow the advice given. It is very likely that you are higher voiced, use your hands more etc than your hubby and this can stimulate puppy play biting behaviour. You are simply more exciting, where as hubby is likely more consistent and 'still' which is comforting, rather than exciting, to the pup.

Give it time. You'll be fine. Don't worry to much, this too shall pass.


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## SS2010 (Jan 26, 2010)

That's how I trained my dogs not to bite every time their teeth makes contact with your skin say ouch even if it doesn't hurt and turn away for a few minutes then start playing again.BTW, You really need to think of any contact between your dogs teeth and your skin is biting or she might think its ok for nibbles,soft biting etc. is ok when it shouldn't be! Also are you rewarding her food for not biting because I don't think that's a good idea.... 

P.S.

If she can run to your husband for attention when shes being punished that's needs to stop! And is probably why she prefers your husband over you because she doesn't understand why your angry.


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## hanksimon (Mar 18, 2009)

There are some previous posts that you can search for on the Forum that go into more detail for teaching Bite Inhibition, as people have suggested.

Also, consider that a Rott is a pushy dog (I think "dominant" is overused and not exactly correct), and Huskies can be independent. So, she may play more roughly than you expect, and your husband may be better at controlling the level of roughness.

Hand feeding one piece of dog food at a time, yelping when nipped, carrying the puppy a little (most dogs don't like to be carried), playing with the puppy but not letting her bully you, yelping or leaving the area when she is too rough, accepting her apology when she realizes that she is too rough (she may bark or play bow) - these are all good methods to communicate the appropriate level of play.

Allow me a little license for a different perspective - don't take me too literally: Think of the interaction that she sees you are her playmate. Her previous littermates played rough and tumble, yelped when hurt, accepted apologies, or walked away when things were too rough. So, if you stop playing with her when things are too rough, but never communicate the appropriate level of play (or you are not consistent in your reactions to her play), then she may think that You hate Her. So, she is confused about how to react to you.


Check these Posts: http://www.dogforums.com/19-first-time-dog-owner/65501-why-my-hand-better.html

And There is a Sticky: The Bite Stops Here.


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## charris (Jan 26, 2010)

I thought this too when I got my dog and I swore he loved my husband more than me. Anything he could find to chew was always mind (somehow). It took a bit of practice but after I ended up opening up to the pup, so did he. It seems like for certain dogs (at least for me) the time can vary but the reward at the end is always worth the wait.


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## MarcusDolby (Feb 3, 2010)

This sounds like my wife who is jealous of me because our puppy prefers to sit on my lap when tired. The reason (in my opinion) is because I spend more structured time with her (training with food/praise) and more time just in general with her. I am also the alpha and am consistent as possible.


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