# My puupy is too attached/separation axiety



## JusTaGirL (May 24, 2007)

I have this dog around 6 months old,we found her abandond at 4 weeks old.She is the best thing thats ever happend to me,i love her sooooooooooo much.Anyways she has this problem were she refuses to leave my sight(not a bad problem compard to wondering dogs) right now she is siting behind me in my computer chair.She flips out if i close the door to the bathroom,leave her ANYWERE even if there is a family member shes used to or other dogs.Shes socailized beond belife i bring her everywere i can with me.I let her sleep in my bed.I think i may have made her this way bye treating her like my child but i could not imagin treating her any differant.I work 10hrs a day 5 days a week and during the time im gone she trashes the house and rips everything appart every day,i dont want to punish her because i let her roam the house and if i put her in a smaller area it might not happen.I feel evil if i was to lock her in a kennel or small room.I dont know what to do anymore.... when my bf brings the dog to pick me up from work she does anything to get in my arms she jumped out of the car window while it was moving and ran right into the store i work at to see me.She is such a sweet heart and it feels good to be this loved but is this normal?


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## briteday (Feb 10, 2007)

You are creating a nightmare. Dogs need boundaries and limitations. Letting her destroy things is not giving her limits and teaching her acceptable behavior, unless you don't mind replacing everything all the time. You should have started crate training from the beginning but it's never to late to start. I would also suggest signing up immediately for an obedience class at your local park district or dog club. If you can't find one ask your vet for suggestions.


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## threedognite (Feb 10, 2007)

Wow. 
Your dog might be the best thing that has ever happened to YOU but you aren't treating your dog like a dog and you are actually encouraging more instability in your dog. 
Your dog 'clings' to you because your dog has seperation anxiety from being abandoned. You might think it's sweet to see your dog behave this way but I can assure you that this is not normal dog behavior.
I'm not posting this to make you feel like a failure. I want to help you and help your dog and you must not take this personally. I don't know you and I'm not here to judge your character. I just want to educate you about your situation so your dog can be a normal dog.
First of all, everything you have done so far is wrong. It isn't your fault because you don't know any better but you will.
You must get in a leadership frame of mind in order to help your dog. Dogs respect calm, assertive energy. Assertive doesn't mean aggressive and calm doesn't mean submissive. Dogs DO NOT respect nervous, angry, negative energy and from this day forward, you MUST learn to be calm and assertive. Your dog is an animal first, dog second and personality (name) last. Treating your dog like a person is the worst thing you can do to your dog. Dogs don't respond to human psychology, dogs respond to dog psychology and you need to learn this.
Because your new dog is so unstable right now, you must set boundaries for her. This means that she does NOT get to sleep in your bed like a furry child, she must be crate trained, potty trained, she must be treated like a dog. She needs to be walked for at least an hour a day or more to release the negative energy she has pent-up inside her, she needs to be on a regular feeding schedule and she needs to learn the rules of the house. Doing all of these things is a psychological need for your dog. Going through rituals and having rules is something dogs must have in order for them to be normal. Do your research and read about pack behavior. Buy some books on how to be your dog's pack leader and read them. 
You said your dog tears up your house when left alone. What did you expect? 
There are only two types of pack members. The leaders and the followers. If you aren't leading, you are following and dogs don't want to be the leaders but when they don't have one, they take over this role and this is when behavioral issues start.
Help your dog, help yourself.


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## JusTaGirL (May 24, 2007)

threedognite said:


> Wow.
> Your dog might be the best thing that has ever happened to YOU but you aren't treating your dog like a dog and you are actually encouraging more instability in your dog.
> Your dog 'clings' to you because your dog has seperation anxiety from being abandoned. You might think it's sweet to see your dog behave this way but I can assure you that this is not normal dog behavior.
> I'm not posting this to make you feel like a failure. I want to help you and help your dog and you must not take this personally. I don't know you and I'm not here to judge your character. I just want to educate you about your situation so your dog can be a normal dog.
> ...


wow,thank you very much for your advice.I didnt realize how seriously bad ive been raiseing her.I feel like a peice of dog poo.(sorry for swearing there it wont happen again)

First off im not defending my self but informing you on the situation a little more. I walk her daily as soon as i get home for about 45mins to an hour,and i have a regular feeding sechule for her and my bf comes home during our shifts to let her out side to use the washroom.I only treat her as a human in the fact that she sleeps in our bed and maby once in a while feeding her a little of my food but its not like im letting her walk all over me.Shes good for not peeing in the house unless shes left alone for hours at a time,i put newspaper down and she still goes where ever she feels.I have had many dogs that sleep at the end of my bed that have never had problems like this,and have known many that havent.

I think you are right and she thinks shes the pack leader or what not.But she listens so well and shes not aggeresive or anything.

I am a very calm person but me and my bf have been fighting alot lately and im sure thats affecting her.She gets so scared that she hides from my bf when hes getting angry.And sometimes if you even raise your voice she goes stiff and hides somewere.


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## Curbside Prophet (Apr 28, 2006)

I'm sorry, but I must disagree with 3DN. This has nothing to do with the perception of who the leader is. But this does have everything to do with what you've trained this dog to do. Yes, you do need to manage her alone time by providing a puppy proofed enclosure with things to keep her occupied. Yes, you do need to look into obedience training. And yes, you do need to exchange your affection for NILIF. NILIF is what's going to help you exchange the behaviors you don't want with the behaviors you do want. 

But again, this has nothing to do with rank as it does teaching the dog how to be polite. The behavior your dog is exhibiting is entirely normal if you don't have a firm grasp of when to reward and when not to reward. Again, this is training, not rank reduction.

I'm not certain your dog has separation anxiety at all...separation anxiety is very rare. You say your dog tears everything up...well, dogs enjoy tearing things up. If they enjoy it, is that anxiety? Now if you said your dog was in a panic the moments before you left, maybe it is anxiety. Separation anxiety is often confused with a dog's agitation that they can't get what they want. This is where NILIF is so useful. 3DG's camp wants you to believe your dog is plotting to take over your place in the pack. B.S.! All your dog needs is to be taught that being polite is much better than being selfishly innocent. That's all, end of story.

You do have a problem however. The longer your dog is left alone, the harder it will be to get your dog on the right track. Expect this, and don't give up. It just means you'll have to work extra harder when you do have time to work with her. IMO, an in home visit by a professional is better suited for your situation than an obedience course. Is this an option for you? 

IMO, it would probably serve you well to seek the help of a professional, even if it were for a one day visit to show you how to puppy proof your home, and teach you how to work on coming and going.


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## JusTaGirL (May 24, 2007)

Curbside Prophet said:


> I'm sorry, but I must disagree with 3DN. This has nothing to do with the perception of who the leader is. But this does have everything to do with what you've trained this dog to do. Yes, you do need to manage her alone time by providing a puppy proofed enclosure with things to keep her occupied. Yes, you do need to look into obedience training. And yes, you do need to exchange your affection for NILIF. NILIF is what's going to help you exchange the behaviors you don't want with the behaviors you do want.
> 
> But again, this has nothing to do with rank as it does teaching the dog how to be polite. The behavior your dog is exhibiting is entirely normal if you don't have a firm grasp of when to reward and when not to reward. Again, this is training, not rank reduction.
> 
> ...


Thank you,so much i really need as much advice as i can get.This is such a great site.I am moving homes and we will have an area for her to stay in with a dog door so she can go out side as she pleases.Im hopeing that this will help her but thinking it also may somehow make it worse( if she comes and goes as she pleases then will she not inform me when she has to go pee anymore?) I am going to crate train again and try to teach her politeness.She is such a good dog other wise though,i really feel like a bad person after reading that what ive been doing is wrong.

She has the largest amount of toys out of anydog i know and i was reading that thread about why your dog needs a toybox and i will try that as well.

For seperation anxiety i really do think she has it,as soon as she sees me getting ready to leave the house she wines,stands by my feet and looks at me so cute that i want to just stay home with her for ever.She barks as im locking the door and walking away.And i know that puppys love and need to chew but she will drag everything everywere,just last night i got a call from my bf saying she just randomly(as he was sitting with her) peed all over our bed pillows,blankets and everything.I think thats something differant though mabey a bladder infection or nervousness i dont know.but she felt very bad about it and ran away right after he let her out,for about half an hour.she never leaves the yard ever even if we leave her alone(im still watching out the window but she doesnt know im there).It was weird.

She has so many issues though or has had.The poor dog has hip problems the vet was saying that she might need replacement hips (so much money but id sell everything i own to make her better).

She might be epileptic,shes had to sezures.I checked everything she could have gotten into and the only posioness thing she was around was a smoke butt(stupid neibours).I know that could make anyone sick,when we went to the vet she had already had a minor sezure,her gums were bleeding and she refuced to drink or eat (only for a few hours)so i forced her water with a suringe.She was also running and barking at top speed and was so crazy i couldnt even hold her or clam her down.She also peed allover her self and had verdigo problems were her head would shake and she would slowly fall over.It was the scareyst time of my life.The vet kept her over night and pumped her with water.But that vet wasnt a very good one and we have know switched to a more expenceive and thorough vet.

Shes had a few more episodes of minor fits,head shakeind and falling over.But hasnt had one in about 3 months.Still though i feel so bad for the puppy and so guilty for her being sick and what not i think thats why i slack in disaplining her.

Anyways i will be getting a trainer in next wednesday and im talking to as many people as i can about it to get more info on what i should do.

Shes a smart dog and i know that this will all work out with time and effort


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## Amaya-Mazie-Marley (Apr 15, 2007)

I have heard that seperation anxiety is rare but I do think I have a dog with seperation anxiety. She will never leave my side, and if I leave the house, I have to have someone here with her, or she has to go somewhere with someone who can watch her. She will physically hurt herself if she's left alone. If something is wrong, she immideatly comes to me. If she gets scared she comes to me. Today she was freaking out and she is a 17 pound dog, pretty low to the ground, but she jumped straight into my arms and headbutted me. I'm exactly sure what the classifications are for seperation anxiety, but I know that my puppy is very very very attached to me and clingy.


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