# Uallis is looking for a new home...



## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

*Attention DF's:

Uallis is looking for a new home. I am typing this for him under threat of him actually chewing my arm off...so it with great sadness that I write this for him...But alas...I have no choice. 

I am forced to say that we have tormented and humiliated him for the last time. Also, he is forcing me to say that he has lived in unspeakable conditions for the last 2 years and he wants all of DF's to hear about it. He is "forced" to have the flashy thing in his face all the time and he lives in fear of it blinding him permanently. He is "forced" to share a house with a big black dog that likes to pull on his flabbers on a regular basis. He lives in daily fear of the 2 evil kitties that have sharp claws...they like to swat him in the face. He would like nothing more than to eat those evil kitties but the humans in his life will not let him. Also, he is very upset with us because we have started watching season 4 of Lost and he hasn't even finished the 3rd one yet. Most upsetting for him. There have been many more atrocities that he has been forced to live and deal with on a daily basis. However, he is still too hurt and traumatized to openly speak about all of them at this point. He hopes that his new human will bear with him and show him understanding during his healing process.

Despite all of this, he has been a brave soldier for the 2 years he has graced us with his presence in our home.

However, this was the last straw that made him decide that he needed to move on and find a new human to grace his presence with:*


















*
Apparently, this drove Uallis over the edge. He decided that he had enough. He had no other choice but to fight back. He regrets that he came to using violence:*



















*MORE...*


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

*Uallis attempted to leave right after the "incident"...however, I talked him into staying until he could find a better arrangement...*










*To alleviate some of his pain, I moved the big black dog outside on a temporary basis...*










*Uallis decided that was fitting revenge for the time being:*










*So at this time, Uallis wants it to be known that he is available to a new loving home...He has no doubt that there will be many people that will be interested...His main concern at this point...is how is he going to take his couch with him?...*


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## FilleBelle (Aug 1, 2007)

Aaahhh, smooshy dog lips!!!!


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

He just has a smooshy face in general...haha


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## Equinox (Nov 11, 2008)

I'd offer him my home, but I don't think I can resist smooshing that face


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## volleyballgk (Jan 15, 2008)

Tell him that if he is willing to put up with two other smooshy faced dogs he can come and live with me. I offer him his own couch, plenty of running room, and I promise not to put the flashy thing in his face (at least not while he is awake!)


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## harrise (Jan 9, 2008)

What a wuss! That was about a 3rd degree smoosh face. Around here, we cut to the chase with a full 1st degree smoosh face...

















Great story.


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## volleyballgk (Jan 15, 2008)

Also...I must warn Uallis that he may be subject to the below indignity:


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## Bonn1997 (Dec 17, 2008)

Is Eddie a purebred lab? He looks huge!


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

harrise said:


> What a wuss! That was about a 3rd degree smoosh face. Around here, we cut to the chase with a full 1st degree smoosh face...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


OMG!! lol that's hilarious!! I'm going to have to get a better smooshy face picture of Uallis now...lol The poor dog is really going to chew my arm off for it but it'll be worth it...lol



volleyballgk said:


> Also...I must warn Uallis that he may be subject to the below indignity:


ROFLMAO!!! I think that has to be the worst and BEST picture I've ever seen!! Poor Payton!! lol



Bonn1997 said:


> Is Eddie a purebred lab? He looks huge!


As far as I know he is. He was a stray so I don't know for sure though. I've always attributed his size his probable poor breeding. He is extremely large for a Lab. Standing next to a "normal" size Lab...he looks twice the size of one. At his last weigh in, he was 110lb, though I figure he's bigger than that now. He has A LOT of bulk and a huge chest. Even though I'm pretty sure he's all Lab, I've vaguely thought about a DNA test because I'm a little curious because his size is massive for a Lab. He's not fat or anything...he's just really bulky and heavy. *_shrug_*


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## Bonn1997 (Dec 17, 2008)

110 lab...Wow! I like Eddie but I'd have to say I LOVE Uallis. He's such an impressive, handsome dog!


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

Bonn1997 said:


> 110 lab...Wow! I like Eddie but I'd have to say I LOVE Uallis. He's such an impressive, handsome dog!


Thanks...lol 

Eddie normally wins people over with his personality...when we have friends over, they actually spend more time with Eddie than Uallis because Eddie is more outgoing and playful...People are usually attracted to Uallis because of his appearance but sometimes disappointed when they meet him for the first time because he doesn't do much in the way of interacting with them. He likes to play and such but normally with people he knows pretty well, otherwise he's kind of aloof.  But he's an impressive dog for sure.


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## alphadoginthehouse (Jun 7, 2008)

Whew...I thought you had really lost your mind!  Cute story but don't ever scare me like that again! I have come to love that big smooshy face...


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

alphadoginthehouse said:


> Whew...I thought you had really lost your mind!  Cute story but don't ever scare me like that again! I have come to love that big smooshy face...


haha sorry...

Don't worry Uallis isn't going anywhere.


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## volleyballgk (Jan 15, 2008)

Mdawn said:


> haha sorry...
> 
> Don't worry Uallis isn't going anywhere.


WHAT??!!! Now I have to go and explain to Max that we aren't getting Uallis and he can't hump his head!


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## digits mama (Jun 13, 2007)

Ill take him! Dozer needs someone more his size to run with..he is starting to get ballerina toes having to play with all the munchkins here...


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## Leroy&Lucy'sMom (Mar 2, 2009)

Mdawn said:


> haha sorry...
> 
> Don't worry Uallis isn't going anywhere.


uh uh, no way, i call false advertisement!!! i was totally gonna take sweet hunky Uallis in! 


really cute story and pics... love it, u should do children's books about your animal crew.


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## Bonn1997 (Dec 17, 2008)

Mdawn said:


> Thanks...lol
> 
> Eddie normally wins people over with his personality...when we have friends over, they actually spend more time with Eddie than Uallis because Eddie is more outgoing and playful...People are usually attracted to Uallis because of his appearance but sometimes disappointed when they meet him for the first time because he doesn't do much in the way of interacting with them. He likes to play and such but normally with people he knows pretty well, otherwise he's kind of aloof.  But he's an impressive dog for sure.


That's interesting. Is Uallis affectionate with you? Do you have a favorite between Uallis and Eddie?


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

volleyballgk said:


> WHAT??!!! Now I have to go and explain to Max that we aren't getting Uallis and he can't hump his head!


I've caught Uallis humping Eddie's head before so...lol 



digits mama said:


> Ill take him! Dozer needs someone more his size to run with..he is starting to get ballerina toes having to play with all the munchkins here...


Ballerina toes...haha that had me laughing. lol



Leroy&Lucy'sMom said:


> uh uh, no way, i call false advertisement!!! i was totally gonna take sweet hunky Uallis in!
> 
> 
> really cute story and pics... love it, u should do children's books about your animal crew.


I don't know if would be good stories to share with children...dogs knocking me down, chewing my arms off...Eddie taking me out with a looonnnnggg stick, Uallis jumping on me and knocking my head off the side of the house...lol I think that would give children phobias of dogs...lol



Bonn1997 said:


> That's interesting. Is Uallis affectionate with you? Do you have a favorite between Uallis and Eddie?


He's not affectionate in the sense that he wants to always lay in our laps or something. He isn't big on cuddling with us either. But he'll lay his head in my lap or paw at me when he wants affection.

As for favorites...No, I don't have one. The simplest way I know how to describe it is...Eddie makes me laugh and Uallis brings me peace. Where Eddie is "loud", Uallis is "quiet", etc...they each have important roles in the family and we wouldn't be complete without either one.


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## Bonn1997 (Dec 17, 2008)

Well they both sound like wonderful dogs!


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## Dieselsmama (Apr 1, 2007)

Awwww, poor Uallis, I can see you're made to suffer all kinds of indignities, you pack up your couch and come on up to live with Auntie Katherine


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

Dieselsmama said:


> Awwww, poor Uallis, I can see you're made to suffer all kinds of indignities, you pack up your couch and come on up to live with Auntie Katherine


Don't give him any ideas...lol The temptation of having Mo as a playmate just might send Uallis running in your direction with his couch strapped to his back...lol


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## Bonn1997 (Dec 17, 2008)

Well you got lots of replies. I think everyone here loves Uallis!


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## alphadoginthehouse (Jun 7, 2008)

One of MY favorites, that's for sure!


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## Sugar Daddy Otis (Jan 9, 2008)

Okay, okay...back off Ladies...Ually is MINE!!!!!!!! Glad I saw this thread before one of you got your hands on him!! Guess I gotta check in here more often or my 2nd boy will disappear behind my back!!


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## volleyballgk (Jan 15, 2008)

Ahem! If you see the above quotes I claimed him before you did. Hands off sister, he's mine!


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## Sugar Daddy Otis (Jan 9, 2008)

volleyballgk said:


> Ahem! If you see the above quotes I claimed him before you did. Hands off sister, he's mine!


Oh Puh-lease!!!! I put dibs on him waaaaay before you came along!!!  Need I find that thread?? (Might take me a century to find it......)
HAHA


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## Mudra (Nov 1, 2007)

So, when should I send the GIGANTIC FEDEX BOX to ship UALLIS here?


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

You guys are just too funny...

I think I'll just let you guys work it out among yourselves who Uallis goes to...lol


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## Mudra (Nov 1, 2007)

Excuse me guys... MDAWN ALREADY SAID BEFORE.. SHE IS SENDING UALLIS TO ME.. na na na na booo booo...


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## Sugar Daddy Otis (Jan 9, 2008)

Mudra said:


> Excuse me guys... MDAWN ALREADY SAID BEFORE.. SHE IS SENDING UALLIS TO SUGAR.. na na na na booo booo...


Awwww Mudra...thanks for sticking up for me!! You know I will give him a great home


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## alphadoginthehouse (Jun 7, 2008)

Sugar Daddy Otis said:


> Awwww Mudra...thanks for sticking up for me!! You know I will give him a great home


Took me reading yours and Mudra's a couple of times to realize you CHANGED her post. I would hate to see the food and vet bills if you had both Ullis and Otis.


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

Sneaky, sneaky Sugar!!


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## Sugar Daddy Otis (Jan 9, 2008)

alphadoginthehouse said:


> Took me reading yours and Mudra's a couple of times to realize you CHANGED her post. I would hate to see the food and vet bills if you had both Ullis and Otis.


 Why, Becky...I don't know what you are talking about 
hehe...I could handle them both...just have to get rid of the DH 


Mdawn said:


> Sneaky, sneaky Sugar!!


What???


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## alphadoginthehouse (Jun 7, 2008)

Sugar Daddy Otis said:


> Why, Becky...I don't know what you are talking about
> hehe...I could handle them both...just have to get rid of the DH


Well, you would need to keep the DH in order to help pay for everything...make life easier for you and the girls... JK DH (in case he ever goes on line)!!!


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## Sugar Daddy Otis (Jan 9, 2008)

alphadoginthehouse said:


> Well, you would need to keep the DH in order to help pay for everything...make life easier for you and the girls... JK DH (in case he ever goes on line)!!!


Hmmmm...true....guess he'll just have to work a little harder to support Ually too


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## volleyballgk (Jan 15, 2008)

Sugar Daddy Otis said:


> Hmmmm...true....guess he'll just have to work a little harder to support Ually too


Okay Sugar I give up! Just don't shoot any ninja's you see sneaking around your house cause it might be me! mwhahahaha!


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

I'm glad Uallis isn't hearing all of this...he'd be impossible to live with. lol

Oh, just so everyone knows...Uallis *AND* Eddie are a package deal...so whoever takes Uallis will also have to take on a neurotic, energy crazed Lab...muhahahhahaha  It would be cruel to separate brothers afterall... We'll just see how many takers we have now...


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## alphadoginthehouse (Jun 7, 2008)

The Heathens SHOULD stay together. I don't think my two could really get along for any length of time without the other (although Butch would probably enjoy a little rest from Roxxy ). Luckily they are both a little big for me, so they are safe from this hyar Texas girl.


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## nitrojedi (Mar 5, 2009)

This an awesome thread !!!! Goos Job !


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## Mr Pooch (Jan 28, 2008)

Nah,he is gona be on a flight across the pond mate ...send when ur ready Mdawn


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## Sugar Daddy Otis (Jan 9, 2008)

Hmmm....2 I could handle....3...I dunno about that......I think Eddie would miss you too much...you better keep him  Ually is too abused in your house to have to suffer another minute there


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## Mdawn (Mar 3, 2007)

alphadoginthehouse said:


> The Heathens SHOULD stay together. I don't think my two could really get along for any length of time without the other (although Butch would probably enjoy a little rest from Roxxy ). Luckily they are both a little big for me, so they are safe from this hyar Texas girl.


Your probably right...lol The do get on each others nerves, but they really do love each other...they just show it in funny ways...





















nitrojedi said:


> This an awesome thread !!!! Goos Job !


Thanks!



Sugar Daddy Otis said:


> Hmmm....2 I could handle....3...I dunno about that......I think Eddie would miss you too much...you better keep him Ually is too abused in your house to have to suffer another minute there


Now, now Sugar...If Uallis is abused...then Eddie is too...lol 
Nice try, though... 



Mr Pooch said:


> Nah,he is gona be on a flight across the pond mate ...send when ur ready Mdawn


Uallis would love all those sightseeing trips...lol


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## volleyballgk (Jan 15, 2008)

Mdawn... that second picture of Eddie trying to pee on Uallis cracked me up. Payton does that continually to Max. what goof balls.


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