# Ever get the urge to choke your dog?



## Inga (Jun 16, 2007)

Ever get the urge to choke your dog? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday was that day. The day that my one dog Carsten was lucky to see the end of. It started out happy, I decided to take the boys (my dogs) and my sister with her 3 human boys up to the woods. There is a place we go that has a small waterfall and creek running through it. It is nice because the dogs can run off leash while we hike. 

I went to my sisters to pick them up and she was just finishing watering some plants (it has been so dry here) Carsten starts off the fun by laying down ON her plants that had just been watered so he is now full of mud and has broke off a bunch of her Lilies. Needless to say "we were NOT happy with him."

Then, the 2 1/2 year old nephew lets him in the house where he proceeds to waltz all over the white floors. Isn't it amazing how far and wide mud can spread? I wouldn't have thought there was that much mud in her entire flower bed. Finally I get everything cleaned up, the dog in the car and we are off to the woods. 

You might think that it gets so much better from there right? Well, it did, for awhile. The dogs were running, having a great time we were hiking all was going good. We are now at leat 2 miles or more from the car. We stop at the falls. I am with the 2 1/2 year old nephew leaning over the water and rocks and we are reaching our hands into the very very cold water. Carsten walks behind me and decides to turn around in the tight quarters. He gives me a shove and I go head first into the water. I had all I could do to shove my little nephew backward so he didn't fall in also. 

I was soaking wet and full of mud. I wanted to kill my dog right then and there. I seriously thought to myself, "I could live with out that dog"
Ever walk over 2 miles in the heat with wet underpants? ICK!!! I can only imagine what other hikers thought when they saw the lady that looked like she had a blow out of poo in her pants. 

Don't get me wrong, this is a sweet sweet dog. He loves pretty much everyone and every thing but... He is a major pain in the back side so often without even trying. Everything he does is innocent but so stinking annoying. To top it off this dog has chronic gas that is so bad it makes a person literally sick to their stomach. So much for well bred dogs being easier then my rescues. This dog is.... challenging.


----------



## odiesmom (May 31, 2007)

sorry but i had to laugh !!! I think my Lucifer is lucky to have survived the day he stole my cell phone and ate it . Or the day he ate my brand new 140.00 dansko clogs. Or the day he stole the turkey and shared it with the rest of the household pets. I could go on and on but I love him still and forgive him.

and this is how he earned his name Lucifer !!!


----------



## titiaamor (Nov 17, 2011)

I had to laugh, too. It reminds me of the time Sacha got really excited about tugging from across the yard, behind me, while I was tugging with Bob. I was really sick and my husband suggested I just go out and pet the dogs and visit with them. Well, with my ears plugged I didn't hear her. She knocked me clear off my feet, right onto my bottom, feet in the air. Ugh

And I have hiked with wet clothes like that- it's awful!

But don't blame your puppy....he's just being him. You don't want him to have a complex!


----------



## wvasko (Dec 15, 2007)

I cannot write more, my stomach hurts from the involuntary guffaws that keep coming from me as I virtually imagine the shove into water.


----------



## LittleFr0g (Jun 11, 2007)

All of a sudden, Kuma ripping a big hole in the garbage bag I forgot to take out with me this morning and spreading stinky garbage all over the apartment doesn't seem so bad, lol.


----------



## ManyRoses (May 28, 2012)

I think everyone has that urge sometimes! Not just with your dog - there have been definite moments where I have the urge to throttle my partner, my customers.....LOL!

I actually had a bit of that yesterday too - Dita truned into pupzilla and decided that it was the day to destroy Tokyo!! Within the span of an hour, she had destroyed more than in the past six weeks! We had given her a bath the day before, so on our walk, she decided that it was mud playtime - running in, out, and through the pond with another dog, rolling around on the banks, and getting plastered in mud....so that she was soaked, the leash was soaked, the collar was disgusting....and she splattered it all over me shaking off! It was a rainy day, too, so my shoes and socks were soaked through when we got home...and then the real trouble starts. First, I made my lunch (including a bowl of tuna with a little mayo), and put it on the table...then turned around to get a glass of water, and turned back to find her with her head in the bowl and half my lunch gone! As I threw it out (yum, tuna, mayo and dog slobber!), she knocked a candlestick off the table, smashing it (and giving me a brief panic that she would eat one of the shards before I grabbed her!). I put her on the other side of the pen that we currently have rigged up like a babygate to sweep up the pieces - there is nothing on the other size but the hallway to the front door - and as I lifted the dustpan full of shards to throw away, saw that she had got hold of the socks that I had put on the chair to dry (being soaked from the walk) and was happily tearing it apart! After removing the sock, I put her back on the other side of the gate again, threw out the shards....and turned around to see her surrounded by the torn pieces of the book I was reading! I had no idea she could demolish it so badly in that short a period of time! And then, once the book was in the garbage too (or at least, both covers and a chunk of the edges!), I found her with the zipper to the cd case!!! Within maybe 15 minutes, she had manged to take out about half of the stuff in the living room.....

There was definitely a moment of throttle-desire at that point! Of course, after bringing destruco-dog out onto the balcony so that there was nothing destroyable, and I could have a cigarette and a minute to calm down, she was the cutest, fluffiest puppy in the world again....


----------



## ThoseWordsAtBest (Mar 18, 2009)

Yeah, but Shammy would just like it.


----------



## Amaryllis (Dec 28, 2011)

You mean the time Muggsy gave my husband a concussion? He chewed off the front legs of the couch, my husband plops down on the couch and gets thrown face first into the coffee table so hard he had to stay in the hospital 48 hours for observation.


----------



## Abbylynn (Jul 7, 2011)

Like the time Leeo wouldn't come when called and ran off in the snow with me chasing him. When all of a sudden I ran straight into a snow covered invisible basketball hoop with my head. Next thing I knew I was lying on my back in a foot of snow! 

While I am lying there seeing little white stars ... Leeo comes running back to see if I am ok ... and then runs off again and hides under a boat! lol! I had a knot on my forehead for weeks! Lol! 

I was so angry I just picked him up when I finally got him and slowly trudged back to the house ... silent.


----------



## sassafras (Jun 22, 2010)

Only every other day.


----------



## cshellenberger (Dec 2, 2006)

OMG Inga! I'm laughing so hard I'm scared I'll wake DH! Glad to hear he's feeling well enough to be up to such antics though. Oh and yes, I feel like choking mine on a regular basis lately, especially Mr Frank who's been housebroken for years and this week decided he was going to mark some of the boxes in the FINISHED basement (on new carpet)!


----------



## Spirit_of_Cotons (Jun 21, 2009)

Oh poor you guys, but lol on the stories. I can't really remember the horrible things Luke has done, but yes. From time to time I get so angry with him, I just want not be anywhere near him! I yell at him and slam the door....then we forgive each other two minutes later. Then he does something stupid and it's back to square one. Yep. Good thing I love him and he's cute.


----------



## NozOnyCalAur (Jun 6, 2012)

Yes, quite often I do. I'm sorry your day was practically terrible, but for the telling we're all wearing smiles.  Thank you.


----------



## Rowdy (Sep 2, 2007)

*laughing* *trying to keep a straight face* **laughing again**

How about the time when the cat opened up the kitchen cabinet, pulled out the garbage, and then let the dogs spread it all over the house for me to find when I came home from a graveyard shift? I wanted to kill all 3 of them.


----------



## Inga (Jun 16, 2007)

I was too uncomfortable to laugh too much when it happened but yesterday we all got together at my parents house for fathers day. Right in the middle of the meal the 2 year old decides to retell the tale in baby language. It went something like "ha ha ha BOOM, Wet, NO! ha ha ha" At first we were all looking at him and then it hit me. I said "did I fall in the water?" He smiled said "YES! WET!" Then went back into a deep belly laugh as he was pointing at Carsten who had long since forgot his big oops. Needless to say, it got laughs from everyone there. Thank goodness my sister didn't have her video recorder or I would have relived the event over and over again. Carsten has proved to be a very challenging dog but not for poor behavior or bad attitude, just for being naturally uncoordinated and horrifyingly gassy.


----------



## titiaamor (Nov 17, 2011)

I feel really bad for laughing so hard at this one...but it's just so darned unexpected!!!



Amaryllis said:


> You mean the time Muggsy gave my husband a concussion? He chewed off the front legs of the couch, my husband plops down on the couch and gets thrown face first into the coffee table so hard he had to stay in the hospital 48 hours for observation.


----------



## Furfinsnfeathers (Jun 5, 2013)

Kuma'sMom said:


> All of a sudden, Kuma ripping a big hole in the garbage bag I forgot to take out with me this morning and spreading stinky garbage all over the apartment doesn't seem so bad, lol.


Oh No! I've DONE THIS! And had a small dog following me and checking to make sure nothing was missed...

My side hurts. They do try us don't they?


----------



## Tylerthegiant (Apr 5, 2013)

JJ is mainly the one I want to put up for adoption, she is just such an annoying dog! Whenever I do something her gigantic body has to be right in my face, normally trying to tug with whatever I'm cleaning up, or leaning her head down to see what I'm seeing and then raising her head before I raise mine and bonking me in the face (she's given me two black eyes doing this), or when I'm reading or on the computer she demands petting and continually plops her gigantic paws or head on me. If I ignore her she'll go grab things she knows she shouldn't have like pillows or my husbands reading glasses and wants to play keep away with them. She is what I call an attention hussy and she is very pushy and demanding, and knows all the things to do to get my attention when I don't want to give it to her. It doesn't sound that bad, but it's constant and it can get on my nerves so bad. Like if I'm petting her, and I have stop to itch my leg, she's pawing at me, and I'm like "Jeez Jage, can't I itch my own dang leg?" Sometimes I kick her out of my room just because I can't stand it anymore! Princess JJ must get what Princess JJ wants ALL THE TIME! She will not be refused! LOL


----------



## Aska (Jun 9, 2013)

Luckily for me, Aska is the sweetest little thing! She doesn't disobey or misbehave, most of the times... sometimes she doesn't obey when I tell her to come when we're walking off leash but I think that's pretty much it. 

... I'd like her to be more mischievous, though. She's always so calm and doesn't really do anything; she often just stands and stares. But well, I guess it's my fault since I bought her from a breeder and the p/s schnauzer is pretty much only being bred for shows. She's still the sweetest and most loving dog I know, thankfully.


----------



## Flaming (Feb 2, 2013)

I added up the total damages Manna has caused to the house since we have had her.

Well if we got a professional to fix things (collapsed patio, holes in walls, replacement clothes, replacement dishes, ect there are probably things I'm forgetting)
~$8500.00 canadian.
It's a good thing my fiance, my mother, my dad and I are good at DIY projects.


----------



## hanksimon (Mar 18, 2009)

@Aska - RE: "I'd like her to be more mischievous, though" - be careful what you wish for 

Just ask someone with a new Lab puppy if you can borrow him ... for an hour. But be careful, the owners may disappear, leaving you with the little mischievous, furry shark...


----------



## AmandaN (Apr 15, 2013)

I'm sorry, but I had to laugh! I've only wanted to choke my dog once in the 2 1/2 years I've had her, but man that one time I had to use so much control!


----------



## Inga (Jun 16, 2007)

Today I took my dogs and went to my sister's house. One of my boys (Carsten) LOVES my sister's little dog and they both go out in the backyard and play for hours while my other boy, Oliver comes in the house and plays with the kids. Oliver thinks of himself as human and has zero interest in running around outside with the dogs. ha ha Anyway, We were all inside playing card when a friend of the family (VERY NON DOG PERSON) decides it is time to go home so off she goes out the front door. About 2 minutes later, Carsten and my sister's little dog come flying in the front door. I was shocked and wondered what happened. This friend said "They were chasing some guy down the street." She clarified that my sister's LITTLE dog was chasing and Carsten was obviously just following along at a much slower pace but who do you think the guy was more afraid of? He was cool about it, thank goodness but I was still NOT happy with my boy. Not really his fault at all. My sister's husband comes out and says "oh sorry, I forgot to close the gate" Ugh! Guess the dogs were not too bright, it took them several hours to notice it.

My sister was more upset because she says "My little dog is the scourge of the neighborhood already as she barks and lunges at the fence when people walk by" ha ha "Now she will have an even worse reputation as a killer attack dog." The friend that let the dogs in the front door is also terrified of the little dog. She said "I just called to Carsten and he followed me back to the house and went in the front door when I opened it, the little dog followed. 

I guess I shouldn't want to choke him for that but... I hate when people get afraid of my dogs for any reason, even if it isn't their fault. I mostly wanted to choke my sister's husband. Carsten still gets points off for following the little dog down the street when she was being ill-mannered because he knows better. He sits out in my unfenced front yard all the time when joggers and kids or people walking dogs go by and he just lays there watching them. I felt like I should give him the speech my mom used to give out. "If your friend jumped off a cliff, would you?" Sassy boy.


----------



## hueyeats (Apr 2, 2013)

Lol! Great read.

Dogs doing the darnest thing.


----------



## Delphinus85 (Mar 20, 2013)

Sorry to laugh at your frustration but that post made me laugh like crazy!


----------



## Inga (Jun 16, 2007)

Delphinus85 said:


> Sorry to laugh at your frustration but that post made me laugh like crazy!


I am laughing a little more this morning as I picture the guy in the Khaki shorts with a dark streak down the back. I myself would have had one if I saw a large dog trucking after me, even if it was the little one that was doing the threatening. I wonder if Carsten came across as semi retarded that he just walked along watching his little friend and not doing anything himself. LIke the Big dog needed a body guard. ha ha


----------



## deege39 (Dec 29, 2008)

One word..................... Marmaduke. lol!  Thanks for sharing your plunders.


----------



## deege39 (Dec 29, 2008)

The only thing Donatello does on a routine basis, makes me want to choke him, is his sneakiness...

I give the boys a raw neck bone a piece out in the yard... When I call for them to come in, Donatello _knows_ he's not allowed to bring it in the house. EVER. So what has he resorted to doing? Shoving the whole thing in his mouth and standing at the door with his head down... It's mischievous and sneaky in such a way that you don't think anything about it until he dashes for the bedroom and spits this raw, bloody, grass, dirt, slobber covered bone on the bed. 

Every. Damn. Time. 

Well, I can't say every time now, I've gotten smarter than my dog now so if he comes to the door w/ his head down I tell him to "spit it out" and it'll hit the porch w/ a *thunk*. >.< My dear ol' BF hasn't caught on to him yet and calls him a "sneaky bastard" every time. lol!


----------



## ShelterPups (Jan 3, 2013)

Flaming said:


> I added up the total damages Manna has caused to the house since we have had her.
> 
> Well if we got a professional to fix things (collapsed patio, holes in walls, replacement clothes, replacement dishes, ect there are probably things I'm forgetting)
> ~$8500.00 canadian.
> It's a good thing my fiance, my mother, my dad and I are good at DIY projects.


I am nodding my head in agreement as I read your comment! Mandy,which I adopted from a local shelter last December, is a Mastiff Shih Tzu mix. I paid $100.00 for her and she has chewed so many items I have lost track. She is without a doubt the most expensive dog I've ever owned.To make matters worse I purchased a Mini Schnauzer April 20 of this year and Mandy has taught him which items to chew on which will cause Mommy to become I should have known better than to bring two puppies into my life within a short time span. We are having carpets removed later this week and having hardwood floors laid. These two puppies have made a total disaster of our carpeting in three of the rooms on my main level. The carpeting is the original but would have lasted much longer had it not been for these two puppies. Gotta L


----------

